Coming to Xbox Next Week: New Games from May 5 to 9

Sure, let’s dive into what’s next on Xbox! It’s a bit of an eclectic mix, so we’ll see where this goes. Brace yourselves for some chaos — my scattered thoughts at play here.

So, Age of Empires II: DE – The Three Kingdoms — yep, that’s a mouthful. History meets legend in this expansion. You’d think they aim to blend storytelling with strategy. Anyway, controlling Shu, Wei, and Wu sounds cool, especially with unique units. Random thought: I always mix these up with old soap operas. Whatever, they’re civilizations, not TV.

Okay, King Arthur: Legion IX. Apparently, it’s this dark twist on the Arthurian legend. An RPG with new heroes and grittier tales. NeocoreGames must love a good challenge, or maybe just potentially confusing quests. Either way, my brain veers off imagining some medieval quest gone wrong.

Now, Metal Eden… where to begin? Hyper Unit Aska sounds intense, like a name a sci-fi writer pulled from a hat. As it’s some compressed cyber-warfare quest, I picture warfare like a techy blender. Hopefully, you unravel the project Eden mystery while dodging Engineer types. Yet, why do “Hyper Units” always sound like energy drinks?

Bartender Hustle arrives like a splash of cool cocktail on a hot day. Mixing drinks and climbing the rank? Kind of wish it translated to real life skills too. Forget cozy neighborhood bars, I’m dreaming of the trendy high-end lounges. Note to self: get that mixology license sooner or later. Totally unrelated, why do shaken cocktails taste better? Is it the bubbles? Never mind.

Submarine Survivor… plunged into the ocean’s depth. New motto: Face fears one pixel monster at a time! If you’re diving into the unknown, brave the sea creatures, because why not? Reminder: get your sea legs ready or face pixelated defeat.

Jumping to Empyreal, a sci-fi RPG — naturally! Seriously though, add a monolith and people start drawing the craziest conclusions. Automatons and ancient civilizations are here too. Always some ancient society in games, like history paparazzi hunting legends.

Now, Penguin Flight: Beyond the Clouds. It’s a platformer. Involves a penguin. Defying gravity. Need I say more? Hope they offer warm cocoa for those flight breaks — chilly skies, you know?

Revenge of the Savage Planet. Pulled straight out of dystopian fantasies, abandoned by corporate greed (familiar, huh?). Play in the corporate aftermath. Rock-turned-lethal puzzles sound terrifying, yet kind of hilarious.

Spirit of the North 2, where you’re a fox, guided by a raven. I guess it’s not quite as simple as a tale from a woodland critter club. Aurora-driven journeys with guardians to save? Sure, randomness checks out. Wonder if there’s an entry fee — probably just believe in magic or something.

The Abandoned Planet aims straight for that 90s nostalgia. Think Myst and Riven but in pixel art. Spaces and puzzles colliding into a singular throwback adventure. Get your puzzle-solving brain activated, or roam hopelessly like I’d probably do.

Okay, who put Truck Simulator Cargo Driver 2025 in here? Adventure on open roads or just highway hypnosis? Transport stuff, keep it safe, slap on “authentic,” then call it a game. But hey, roads are where dreams supposedly blend with reality, right?

AMAZE! is neither grand nor understated, just paintball on steroids through mazes. Strategizing color applications seems oddly relaxing right now. My brain hits pause on life outside this colorful grid.

Finally, Eyes: The Horror Game. Haunted settings, creepy corridors, and eyes on walls? Yeah, no thanks. Kudos to players who have nerves of steel – gyms seriously need to adopt horror theme training. Anxiety? Meet terrifying hallucinations. At least, mystery lovers get their kicks.

Did you make it through this labyrinth of thoughts? If you did, you deserve a cool game from the list. Or don’t. Just live that disconnected, free mind roam. Adios, gaming adventurers!